the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
