I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
