She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
