hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Randomize
