Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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