just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
