i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
