I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize