okay pat passed out under dana's car
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
