I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
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