found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
