Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
