She is in my trunk
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Houston, we have a squirter
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
