Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
