after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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