Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
