We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
