How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
