Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Let's get the cat blown out
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
