It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
She needs sedatives and a leash
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
