Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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