but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
