So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
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