I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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