38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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