My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
