i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
