guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Randomize
