a queef is a wish your heart makes.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
