She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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