TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
