Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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