Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
