Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I need water and some morals
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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