I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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