Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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