I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Who wears a wallet chain?!
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
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