Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
