Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Randomize
