I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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