Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
