; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
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