i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
