if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
