and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
