yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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