I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He? As in you personified your dick?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
We need to get me chipped asap
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
