What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
