Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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