when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
