Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize
